‘You may not control all the events that happen to you, but can decide not to be reduced by them’ Maya Angelou.

 It’s a while since I’ve posted, mainly because life has been such an effort over the last two months.

I mentioned in my earlier post that I had strained a muscle in my back and had found it incredibly painful. I have had it happen occasionally in previous years, but this was the most painful and I’m struggling to get back to some kind of normal.

 Do we have a normal with fibro? 

I’m trying to find humour in everything that I struggle with and with some things it’s easy - like trying to put on leggings, jeggings or tights and if I manage to Put one foot in, the other foot is an even bigger challenge as i try to stay upright!   Eventually, if I manage to get both legs occupied, I then have to negotiate pulling them up. Laughing at myself is the only way!  I only put them on when I’m leaving the house - one of the downsides of the colder weather as bare white legs are a no-no.  I keep a walking cane by the side of my bed and use it to help push me up from the bed, but slowly. I’ve tried a bed rail, but didn’t have the muscle strength to pull myself upright, whereas I’m pushing on the cane from a different angle. Takes a little practice, but worth it. I also keep my knees together when getting in and out of bed. I’m remembering to squat a little when I clean my teeth, have a wash, etc, rather than bend and I’m concentrating more on my posture.  Walking is a little slow go, but it’s one of my loves and I try to go for a short walk most days.  And I remember the word of Mr Motivator - hold your shoulders as if you are trying to squash an orange between them.  I do try!  Being outdoors is my comfort zone - it’s where I feel most at home and at peace.

I’ve been doing lots of reading online too and there’s lots of information on there with regard to the connection between fibro and other ailments or conditions. and there are many!  When I was first diagnosed with fibromyalgia, it was little known and my doctor told me I would have to do some research, as he knew nothing about it either.  But I had no internet connection then either and a friend used to bring me books and videos back from America where it was more widely accepted and still is, I think. I think it’s quite sad that I could tell my doctor that I have bad headaches (and I do), or that I have terrible back pain, and he’ll believe me, but if I mention that I have fibromyalgia, he thinks everything I feel is in my head and imagined.. It baffles me! I’ve tried to get an explanation, but have now given up and deal with it myself.  I’m pleased there is so much information out there now - we are not alone! 

I have lived alone for some years and there are still some things that I struggle with and I get angry with myself, but I’m grateful for my litter picker as it helps me in so many ways. It can’t lift the heavy things, or open jars, or wash my hair when my arms hurt too much to raise, but it helps a lot.  

On the whole, I feel blessed for the things that I can do and I’m grateful every day. I meditate every day, practice mindfulness, journal and spend as much time outdoors as I can, even if I’m only standing in the garden or watching the birds. I read an article where a child had described life as Brutiful, rather than Beautiful, and I quite agree. I hope that little one doesn’t mind me borrowing it.

We read it all the time, don’t we? ‘It isn’t what happens to us, but how we deal with it’. Some days are easier than others, but I remind myself that at least I have some days 😀

Wishing everyone a pain free and peaceful day.

Namaste

Tina