My Life - My Fibro

 I do keep having the strangest dreams and wonder if my anxieties are coming out through them.  My body is still itching, but the worst spot is on my arm, which I've been smothering with Aloe gel from my house plant. However, if the gel works and eases the itch, I tend to forget to reapply, which I did yesterday evening. In my dream last night, I dreamt that my arm was totally red from the fingers to the shoulder and it wasn't only itching but burning and it didn't look good. A friend called in to see me, noticed I was rubbing my arm, and insisted that I call the doctor which I was loathe to do and I said to her "but if I go, he'll give me a jab and then another for the virus, while he's got me there". I mentioned both those things in my blog post yesterday - my caution with the new vaccine and the itching, so maybe dreams do make some sense sometimes! I went through my usual routine this morning - gratefulness meditation,  cuppa at six, washed and dressed...

I find the above quote, particularly true and have been reminded of it today. forty years on since John Lennon was shot. I remember that morning so well. Our house was always full of music - my children were brought up on it. The tv might have been on most evenings, but so was the stereo. we began collecting vinyl, then cassettes and then cd's and we had to build more shelves to store them on. they had to be in sight. When we seperated, my husband of twenty five years insisted they were all his - all 2500 albums - and left me with the ones that I had accumulated before we married. I didn't argue - it made life easier! Since then I've accumulated a good collection of cd's, cassettes and still the odd vinyl, but Spotify has changed my life and I can have music on tap. Wonderful!  But what a sad loss of a great talent! Another moment in history, is the arrival of the vaccine for Covid 19. How amazing is that? I want to be excited, but feel quite nervous too, because I don...

I usually get up about six o’clock and make myself a drink which I take back to my bedroom to drink while watching the news headlines. It’s still dark out and I find it cosier sitting on my bed - comfortable too. I’ve always had the strangest dreams, though they’ve become stranger since my partner died, and I do my best to try and make sense of them.  I rarely manage to! Mornings are slow and achey, but I know how lucky I am to be able to look after myself, especially in present times.  The quote by John Muir is one of my favourites, because it explains how I feel about being outdoors - it’s like going home. It’s the place where I feel most at peace and where I feel I belong. I’m very lucky to have a garden, but looking after it isn’t easy for me and I may have to think of looking for somewhere with a courtyard rather than a large garden, though I think that’s in the distance.  When I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia, my doctor knew little about it and told me to look in t...

 Well, here I am, and still wondering what the future holds for all of us. In England, we’ve gone into a second lockdown to try and slow the infection rate. I do take a short walk most days, but people aren’t very considerate and only one or two try to put a space between us. I think I’m very lucky, because I can go for a walk on the cliff top ten minutes away, and move around people if I need to, but I have to get there first and that means walking along busy pavements.  I love to be outdoors though and somehow feeling the fresh air on my face, watching and listening to the waves as they move in and out towards the shore and enjoying the wildlife, somehow gives me hope and I need that at the present time.  Unfortunately, my anxieties have been quite high and that’s affecting my fibromyalgia and, in turn, my IBS. My body seems to ache constantly and I feel so very tired. There are other niggling problems too and I’m sure they’re anxiety based, but if I can get a little fr...

Wow! It's been a long time since my last post and the world has changed!  Sadly, my world indoors has changed too. Four days ago, I said goodbye to my beautiful fur baby Sparkle and it broke my heart. She was a rescue cat and nearly twenty, though you would never have believed it, as she still looked like a kitten. Since losing my partner, she has been my constant companion and I’m feeling quite lost and empty. I‘m sure I wouldn’t have made it through lockdown without her and the love she has given to me. Nine days before losing her, she began to get a little wobbly on her hind legs and couldn’t jump to the high places where she liked to hide. I rang the vets and made an appointment - not easy in these times - for the following day. My daughter took her along, as I’ve been shielding, and after blood and urine tests they found she had a kidney disease and arthritis. Unfortunately, they couldn’t give her pain killers, because of the kidney disease and my poor girl deteriorated over ...